星期一, 8月 15, 2005

In a room without stars

.
.
.
In a room without stars, without
the time telling us when to go ...
this had become my home.
I had no right to stay, never
knowing when to say farewell
to the close of our agreement.
Perhaps it had been clearer to you.
.
.
I could only hear the moaning of rain
outside the hallway, where the sun thrusts its rays.
Not here, not where I thought
the void had been filled with hope.
Your scent rubbing off on me
like the pretense of breathing
enthralled with the death of my egregiousness.
.
.
I remember myself grazing the plains,
slender like your abdomen, the hint
of shrubbery where seeds were sown in daylight.
Don't you miss this thing of beauty
this heart beating ostensibly?
I could not find any other dedication
as mild as the untamed beast, yet milder
than its incorrigible tamer.
I had your arms to shelter me
the foundations of the house, or were they my own
holding on the gutters of the roof?
I had only me to shelter from myself.

.
.
The first and the last thoughts, the compromises,
took only two days to forget.
Would it be the dark sky
or merely the intimacy of stars
that I miss so badly?
I'd continue to walk the road alone,
still trapped in your room, or me,
trapped inside my own disillusionment?
.
.
I had no right to stay and all the reasons to leave
here I am feeling shame for my lack of guilt.
And now that I'm in my own room
I realize it hasn't been the stars that guide me.
.
.
.

2 Comments:

At 2005年10月14日 下午3:14:00 [GMT+8], Anonymous 匿名 said...

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At 2008年2月20日 上午9:55:00 [GMT+8], Anonymous 匿名 said...

I don't really know, but last week my teacher told me something like "real love happens when you can sincerely say 'I'd be fine even without you' and still we decide to stay by that person's side, it's because love doesn't mean to need each other or to stare at each other "in love", but to share each one's wellness and to stare together at the same direction, then, let love be.

 

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